awaits, anticipate. it's not just a day.

I take back what I said about my birthday, I actually look forward to it now even if I have not much expectations.
No expectation is always better.
Maybe I'm looking forward to it because it feels like the people around me are remembering the date, and somehow I'm often being asked," So how do you feel that your birthday is coming." Can't help being influenced to anticipate the day.

Okay, turning 20 isn't bad. A year older would only mean a year closer with God, with a year's journey with my family and friends, a year towards knowing more people, a year's worth of blessings, a year closer to independence and not having my parents to bear the burden, a year closer to hopefully meet my potential other-half forever whoever that person may be I don't know depends on whether I'm meant to or want to get married, a year closer to new experiences.

Most importantly, turning 20 is worth giving thanks for. Not everyone make it to this decade of their life in this world.
Every birthday, I give thanks to God, for the fact that I'm not very sick and pretty healthy. That my Mitral Valve Prolapse condition that I'm born with is only mild, still mild, and never serious.
Many kids out there are born with worse things.

For all these, I thank God for my life and I thank Him for this day. I am thankful that I am given a chance to anticipate my 20th Birthday right now, this moment. Such feeling is worth savouring and ought to lingers each day.

Today I got reminded of these, when I saw bits of my favorite poem on twitter.

LIFE, believe, is not a dream

So dark as sages say;

Oft a little morning rain

Foretells a pleasant day.

Sometimes there are clouds of gloom,

But these are transient all;

If the shower will make the roses bloom,

O why lament its fall?

Rapidly, merrily,

Life's sunny hours flit by,

Gratefully, cheerily

Enjoy them as they fly!

What though Death at times steps in,

And calls our Best away?

What though sorrow seems to win,

O'er hope, a heavy sway?

Yet Hope again elastic springs,

Unconquered, though she fell;

Still buoyant are her golden wings,

Still strong to bear us well.

Manfully, fearlessly,

The day of trial bear,

For gloriously, victoriously,

Can courage quell despair!

Charlotte Bronte